M3 - Understanding Feedback & D1 - Discussing Client Considerations

UNDERSTANDING FEEDBACK & DISCUSSING CLIENT CONSIDERATIONS

 FINAL PITCH:

FEEDBACK/QUESTIONS:

1. 'We see a sexual assault and I think for BBC 16-21 year olds, the way that it would be exactly that shown would have to be done very very carefully and actually I'd probably say not to'

2. 'Do we get to see the whole assault scene, or is it like Perks of being a Wallflower where bits of it come through'

Answer = 'I was think more of that, because of the age rating of 15 I would have to show glimpses of it as to not be inappropriate' I think I would be careful about what detail I was showing as I want it to be informative and raw but not be too inappropriate as to distract from the message I am trying to present. I would show glimpses of the assault to suggest it but not show it in complete detail. I may also choose to show glimpses of it but leave it somewhat ambiguous to the audience whilst the character herself is still trying to understand what happened, so we can go through the journey with her and understand a little bit of what she's feeling. It's also incredibly important to be thoughtful of the audience as a whole, and those people who may relate to her story, I want to make the scene in a way that is triggering or unrepresentative. 

3. 'We don't get the brothers reaction, and I think that is full of potential dramatically' 'you didn't really talk about [the brothers reaction]'

4. 'We need a line on it, why the character says what she says and does what she does it, why she says what she says or why she has the opinion she has'

Strengths:

Characters = 'The relationships were strong and very very dynamic dramatically, so that lots could be got out of each of the situations'

When writing my script I will take this into consideration and make sure to completely explore all the relationships between characters and pull out elements that are most dramatic. For example, I will make sure to fully write into the narrative when Sam and Violet break up, and both of their reactions to it. I will also include the tension between Violet and Olivia, that can be easily shown as a dramatic storyline if I include the idea of Olivia's character becoming concerned and tired of Violets destructive behaviour.

Narrative and Representation = 'I liked the grey area of consent, especially for the age range because you're taught consent so much and how important consent is and that leaves a lot of grey areas in that idea of consent. Like; has Sam done something wrong, has Violet done something wrong, George definitely has but they all have in some ways... its nice to play with a narrative where everyone has done something that could be considered wrong'

This is something that I was aiming for when creating the show, to show each character as very realistic and having flaws so I'm glad this came across in my pitch. I will make sure to present this when creating my show and not just presenting these binary opposites to the audience of good vs evil to create an interesting and dramatic story. This is especially important in presenting in Violets character. Specifically, we see Violet lying about her age to Sam. This leads to them having a relationships and then Sam finding out. When they break up because of this and we see Sam's reaction we can understand what position Violet put sam in, even unintentionally, and how her behaviour was really wrong.

Powerpoint and Characters = 'From your opening it is very arresting... that's a very very strong opening line, immediately you think how are all the people in this gonna manage their relationships in every way as they go forward, whatever they choose to do; if she goes to the police, if her brother says your lying, if they end their friendship, if they remain friends, all of it is full of big things that are going to be very dramatic'

Here I can understand that my message is effective, and perhaps this opening line is something I can bring in to post production documents like posters or descriptions on the BBC3 platform to entice audiences.

Weaknesses:

Legislation = 'We see a sexual assault and I think for BBC 16-21 year olds, the way that it would be exactly that shown would have to be done very very carefully and actually I'd probably say not to' 'things are still up for grabs... how exactly the brief is done is what's key'

This feedback is telling me that I need to be careful about how I show the sexual assault scene. This is already something I had been thinking about so was glad to hear feedback on it. From this I can understand to only suggest the sexual assault to the audience and be careful not to trigger any of the audience or to be too inappropriate. I do think it's important to at least suggest it to the audience, as this is key to how Violet is acting all through the show and what the message of the show actually is. However I might decide to just suggest it to the audience but leave it ambiguous whilst the character is still coming to terms with what happening herself, and slowly reveal it. This may make the audience more prepared for the mature themes of the show and if anyone feels that the show is not appropriate for them they will be able to stop watching as this first initial warning - in a sense - of the themes ahead. For example, for the first glimpse of the rape scene I will just show George entering violets room and then a few flashes of scenes of close ups of his hand covering her mouth so she can't scream, and a close up of her silently crying and then a slow cut away shot to suggest that the scene isn't done, just that the audience isn't  seeing everything.

Narrative = 'We don't get the brothers reaction, and I think that is full of potential dramatically. You don't really focus on what is the brothers reaction when he finds out that A this has been kept a secret from him... does this remain his best friend or does somehow Violet intimate to him that his best friend isn't great... whatever happens there is going to be a moment when it is fully revealed wether it is Violet or not, you know he's going to find out that there's this accusation from another girl and this historical accusation which is much more important to him so that is really fun of drama for everybody concerned. You didn't really talk about [the brothers reaction]'

This is something I will take into consideration when writing the script. I will make sure to completely explore Violets relationship with Alex. I want their relationships to be - not immediately - obvious to the audience as a main narrative point but by the end of the show we understand how important Alex and Violets relationships is and how important it is to each other. I also understand now to show all these different plot points on screen, such as Alex finding out about the assault (both the other girl and Violet) and how potentially Violet tells Alex herself. To work on this feedback, I cam thinking of including a scene between Alex and Violet where Violet tells Alex about the assault. I want it to be a very intimate and honest scene of just them two. She will tell him and the audience will see Alex's initial disbelief and shock, but then him breaking down when she is persistent with him and he realised she is telling the truth. I want the scene to include tense sets of dialogue but also a lot of silence so the audience feels a lot of tension and emotion about how Alex will react. This will help to build up both of their characters and help the audience to understand their relationship with each other.

Representation = 'We need a line on [her opinion about her relationship with Sam], why the character says what she says and does what she does it, why she says what she says or why she has the opinion she has'

This feedback is telling me that I need to carefully consider how Violet is acting morally, and make it clear to the audience why she is acting the way she is. Making sure that all the characters and themes are represented properly is one of the challenges I knew would come about when choosing this idea, so getting this feedback helps me to understand when to tread more carefully and think more in certain areas. I don't want to just create Violet as a reckless and at times bad character to the audience is for no reason, as I don't want to create stereotypes about survivors and victims of assault that the media can sometimes play in to. I need to make clear narratives and plot points that mean the audience understands how she is acting. I am hoping be able to do this as the show progresses, with the end of the show being key to Violets progression when both she and other people start to realise why she's been acting the way she has. Violets scene with Sam where she tells him about her sexual assault helps to show this, we see Sam's reaction and how it all starts to makes sense to him; why Violet acted the way she did in their relationships. However throughout the show, and in Sam and Violets relationships, we will be able to understand why Violet feels her relationships with Sam is ok (and feels ok lying to him) because of how broken she is. I will show this through close up emotive scenes of Violet as the show goes on and she struggles with her relationships. The audience will begin to understand that she if fine with lying to Sam and feeling their relationships is okay because she was forced to be as mature as Sam abruptly by George through the sexual assault, so lying about it comes naturally to her; because to her, there isn't anything wrong with the age gap because she has been through a terrible experience with George. The last scene helps the audience to understand this as Violet and Sam have a very honest conversation with each other about their past.

CONCLUSION OF IMPROVEMENTS:

- I will make sure to be careful around the rape scene and only suggest the event by using short close up clips and using a cut away scene of the bedroom to suggest to the audience that they aren't seeing the whole story. This will mean I can properly follow all the age restrictions of BBC3 and not make my show too inappropriate.

- include in the narrative key elements in Violet and Alex's relationships. Specifically, I will write into the script a scene between Alex and Violet where she tells him that she was assaulted by George, so that the audience can see this emotional interaction between them which allows them to connect to their characters more and make the most dramatic effect.

- I will make sure to carefully plan out Violets actions in the narrative as to not play into any harmful stereotypes about victims of assault. I am trying to make Violet more of a dimensional character by not presenting her as just a nice, naive and broken girl. A key part of my narrative is that Violet does also act in a harmful way sometimes and is hurtful to those around her because of what she went through. Violet will have a big character development over the series to show this, as she descends into being a broken, rebellious and destructive girl. However this comes with stereotypes by the audience of victims of assault. I am wanting to break these by presenting a different viewpoint and creating a character who feels like a real person to audiences, both when she is reckless at the end and at the beginning when she is more naive. I will include in the script a scene between Sam and Violet where he finds out her age, we see his reaction to this, so the audience can understand properly how Violet has acted in a harmful way (making her more of a dimensional character who also makes mistakes and isn't just a helpless victim). However this avoids stereotypes when she later admits to him that she was assaulted and admits that she was wrong, presenting her in a much more humane way.

- The end of the show will provide a key part in the progression of the narrative. I will make sure to include raw and meaningful scenes like a conversation between Violet and Sam where she finally admits she was assaulted. This will help the audience to see clearly the character progression of Violet.